What's everyone thinking during a 911 call?
View Common Scenarios
Let’s walk through a few scenarios and common questions survivors may have about the LAP process and police intervention overall.To better understand everyone’s role and experience during a domestic violence call, we’ll look at these scenarios from the perspective of the survivor, law enforcement, and a domestic violence advocate.
What happens when the police are called?
Survivor Perspective
“What if they don’t believe me?
It’s happened before.”
Survivors may have past experiences either with the police or others in their lives where they haven’t been believed. Abusers can be manipulative and may appear charming to others.
This may make survivors hesitant to call police if they fear the abuser will not be arrested, leaving them in the home with the abuser to deal with the repercussions of calling for help.
POLICE Perspective
“Be prepared for anything. I can't gauge the level of danger until I arrive.”
Law enforcement often enters situations with minimal or no information about the current situation or history of either party.
Domestic violence calls are one of the most dangerous calls they receive, with multiple cases of Connecticut police officers being killed by domestic violence offenders at the scene. This means police will be cautious and ask a lot of questions.
What can happen with my kids when the police are called?
Survivor Perspective
“If I call police, will DCF come and take my children away?”
Survivors often resist calling for police intervention for fear that they will be reported to DCF and their children will be removed. This is a valid fear that could impact their level of cooperation.
When DCF does become involved, survivors should be connected to domestic violence advocates to help them navigate the system and understand their options.
ADVOCATE Perspective
“We can help navigate the child welfare system.”
Police officers and domestic violence advocates are both mandated reporters, meaning they have a duty to notify DCF if they believe that a child has experienced abuse or neglect.
Domestic violence advocates know the impact that the child welfare system can have on survivors and their children. They will advocate for survivors and work with DCF to help survivors and their kids be safer.
During LAP: What happens during the investigation & LAP screening process?
Survivor Perspective
“They’re asking a lot of questions and I’m scared of what happens next, so I may not tell them everything.”
Survivors may be concerned about the impact that their abuser’s arrest may have on their family. “Will they lose their job and will that mean we can’t make rent?” “Who will watch the kids?” “Will they be safe in jail?”
Not all survivors want the relationship to end, some just want the abuse to end. They may grow weary as more questions are asked, fearing that an arrest will only make things worse. This can be particularly true when the survivor was not the one to call the police, but instead a bystander called.
Police Perspective
“Details matter. If they tell me about past events, I can provide better help.”
Specific questions on the LAP screen will identify if you are in a high-danger situation and may help you view behavior that you have become used to through a different lens. Answering questions fully will help police to identify possible areas of escalating violence and get you connected to your local domestic violence advocate.
While the questions and danger assessment score may be overwhelming, advocates will be there to help tailor a safety plan that works for you.
During LAP: What happens when I speak to the officer?
SURVIVOR PERSPECTIVE
“I’ve put up with this for a long time and tonight I pushed him back. They’ll probably arrest me too, so why tell them everything?”
Sometimes survivors respond to abuse with abuse. This can be particularly true for survivors who have been exposed to a long history of control and coercion. This is why it is critical for law enforcement to always make an assessment about the dominant aggressor.
Arresting survivors will almost certainly mean that they won’t reach out to police for help in the future, significantly decreasing their safety moving forward.
POLICE/ADVOCATE Perspective
“She’s telling me she doesn’t want him arrested, but I determined he’s the dominant aggressor and I have to make an arrest.”
Police in Connecticut are mandated by law to arrest a person who has committed a family violence crime and who has been determined to be the dominant aggressor. It’s not up to you whether they press charges.
Being truthful will assist in the accuracy of their safety assessment and ability to get you connected to the appropriate support and services to help increase your safety.
Getting in touch with support.
Survivor Perspective
“What good can a phone call do? It’s not like they are here with me.”
Because of the isolation and control that is often at the center of an abusive relationship, survivors may feel helpless and think that no one will be able to help them. Law enforcement should encourage survivors to speak with a domestic violence advocate, even when they have not scored high danger but the officer’s gut tells them the situation is dangerous.
Advocates work with many survivors, all of whom have different experiences, and may be able to help the survivor think of ways to stay safe that they never otherwise would have thought about.
ADVOCATE Perspective
“We offer support and helpful resources, plus 24/7 safety planning.”
Certified domestic violence advocates are available at CCADV’s 18 member organizations and at Safe Connect, Connecticut’s domestic violence information and resource line. Advocates are trained to understand that everyone’s relationship looks different and can change over time.
Some survivors just want the abuse to end, not the relationship. Others want to end the relationship. Our advocates are here to listen and provide you with the options that make sense for what you want. Get free & confidential information and support for anyone impacted by domestic violence.
What happens now?
Survivor Perspective
“I’ve completed the LAP screen, now I just want the police to leave. I don’t want to talk with anyone else.”
Involvement with law enforcement can be overwhelming and scary. They may not respond how you want them to, but they are there to help and be a resource to their community.
If a police officer is encouraging you to speak with an advocate, it’s because they know that trained advocates can be beneficial to your overall safety and get you connected to resources that can help you to be safer.
Police Perspective
“I have another call I have to get to and I don’t have time to get her connected to an advocate.”
Some law enforcement agencies experience high call volumes and may feel the need to clear a call after the CT LAP screen is completed. CT LAP not only benefits survivors, but it also helps police officers by creating a structure to assess the level of danger. Whether or not an arrest can be made, the connection to an advocate is crucial.
Domestic violence advocates can provide tailored safety plans and long-term support and services that can help the survivor and their family be safer and better prepared.
Top Things We Want Officers to Know
Trauma, whether immediate or long-term, can have a significant impact on the brain, which in turn impacts how a survivor reacts both to their abuser and to law enforcement. Trauma can limit the brain’s ability to recall events in a linear timeline. This means that even though the timeline of events a survivor provides may not make sense, it does not mean they are lying or trying to be difficult. They are only able to articulate their situation as their memory and brain allows.
Intimate partner violence is complex. The person who you love is the same person who is abusing you. Some victims don’t want the relationship to end, they just want the abuse to end. They may also have valid fears about their partner’s interaction with law enforcement or correctional institutions, particularly if they are men or women of color. This means that even if a survivor panicked and called police at a moment when they were scared, police involvement may ultimately be unwelcome. Survivor behavior that feels difficult or obstructive may, for them, be more about protecting the person they love, including their children.
As we previously mentioned, trauma can lead to a frustrating interaction for both the survivor and police officer. Lean on trauma-informed interviewing techniques. It’s important to explain why you are asking questions, to be clear about what you are legally required to do, and to respect survivors’ choices where you are legally able. Control is at the core of domestic violence and police officers can help survivors regain some of that control simply by believing and respecting them.
Because domestic violence is all about control, the time when survivors begin to take steps to end the relationship is precisely the time that the abuser will feel a lack of control and may escalate their abuse tactics and level of violence. Abusers often limit access to money as a method of control, which significantly complicates a survivor’s ability to “just leave.” How can you leave if you can’t afford somewhere else to live? It’s important to appreciate these complexities and encourage survivors to connect with their local CCADV member organization that can offer resources and options.
Top Things We Want People To Know
In Connecticut, if police have probable cause to believe that a family violence crime has been committed, they are required by law to arrest the person they believe to be the “dominant aggressor,” or the person who poses the most serious ongoing threat in a situation involving the suspected commission of a family violence crime. Unlike what you may see on television, police cannot take into consideration your opinion on whether or not they will make an arrest.
When law enforcement responds to a domestic violence call, they may be hypervigilant, especially if you and/or your partner are yelling. Until they can assess the level of danger and calm emotions, their actions may seem rigid and guarded. Unfortunately, there are multiple incidents in Connecticut where police officers were seriously injured or killed by the abuser at the scene of a domestic violence incident. It is important to follow their instructions and stay as calm as possible when interacting with police.
CCADV and our 18 member organizations work closely with state and municipal police departments. Responding police officers may suggest that you speak with an advocate and will leave behind materials with information about how you can reach out for help when you are ready. Connecting with an advocate does not mean that you have to go into shelter. Our advocates are here to give you options and help you think through ways to be safer. We will always take your lead since you know your situation best.
Things We Want Everyone To Know
We all have different perspectives & sometimes make mistakes.
No one gets it right all the time - that includes survivors, advocates, and the police. We all have individual experiences, knowledge, and community and cultural norms that impact our actions and how we approach situations. Different viewpoints are not an indicator of ill-intent. Patience, compassion, and avoiding judgment are all key to understanding one another and building trust.